What is mediation—and what does a mediator do?

Mediation is a process through which parties resolve disputes through negotiations facilitated by a a neutral third-party—the mediator. A mediator enables mediating parties to constructively and collaboratively explore and agree to viable solutions, memorialized in a formal and binding agreement.

The mediator’s role is to facilitate a negotiation, constructively eliciting parties to communicate about issues sustaining and exacerbating disputes, collaboratively exploring options of resolution, and, with the parties, crafting a mutually-agreeable and binding agreement.

As a process, mediation presumes that, through facilitated communication, parties can resolve a dispute without sacrificing autonomy and self-determination.

For more information, see the American Bar Association's What Are the Advantages of Mediation and the U.S. Office of Special Counsel's Advantages of Mediation.

Is a Mediator like a Judge? Does he decide who is right and who is wrong?

No. By definition, a mediator is a third-party neutral who works with the parties to a dispute in exploring issues affecting a dispute and its resolution, and crafting a mutually-agreeable negotiated agreement resolving the dispute to each parties’ satisfaction. In mediation, parties determine what constitutes a fair and just resolution. A mediator is there to facilitate negotiations, guiding parties through discussions, ensuring that all issues germane to a dispute are fully explored, providing information and resources as necessary and at parties’ request, and enabling parties to remain in control of resolving their own dispute. No judgments are rendered by the mediator, and no agreements are finalized until and unless the mediating parties agree to all terms. The mediator guides discussions and elicits constructive negotiations. A skillful mediator impartially and equitably encourages party autonomy and self-determination, ensuring party investment in and commitment to the mediation process.

Does mediation work?

Participants in mediation report higher satisfaction rates than people who go to court. Because of their active involvement, parties have a higher commitment to and stake in honoring a mediated agreement than those who leave decisions as to what is best for them, and their children, to a judge. Mediations respect the dignity and priorities of parties throughout the process. Studies have found that mediation ends in agreement 70 to 80% of the time.

The situation I’m dealing with is extremely sensitive. Can the process be kept private?

Except for allegations of child abuse and elder abuse, all aspects of and disclosures made in a mediation are confidential.

Where does a mediation take place?

In short, wherever parties feel the most comfortable to have a frank and candid discussion and negotiation. This may be over Zoom, in a professional meeting space, or in a private area of a community location, such as a library. The parties will discuss their preference with the mediator during initial consultations, and the setting of a mediation can change from session-to-session — again, depending on shifting circumstances and comfort.

To inquire further about the mediation process and how it may be beneficial to your circumstances, contact Eric by email at eric@wnymediation.com, by phone at (716) 732-0323, or send a message through our secure portal.

What is divorce mediation?

In a divorce mediation, a mediator--an expert, third-party neutral--facilitates the negotiation of a comprehensive, binding, and enforceable Separation Agreement that will enumerate each person’s rights, responsibilities, and expectations.

At a divorce mediation, clients will be informed about and guided through the process of formally divorcing in New York State. Parties will consider financial and other implications of divorce to enable clients to make fully informed decision about whether a divorce is necessary.

What is custody mediation?

Custody mediation is generally limited in scope to issues regarding separated parents raising a child: , custodial arrangements, schedules, and decision-making authority,

A comprehensive divorce mediation incorporates financial considerations into Separation Agreement negotiations.

My partner and I both want to be involved in our children’s lives. Is mediation right for us?

Yes.

A long-term study found that an average of 6 hours of mediation significantly increased nonresidential parents' involvement in their children's lives and caused improvement in long-term co-parenting.

Mediation is ideal for parents that would like to craft an Separation Agreement tailored to their, and their children's, needs and interests.

I’d like this matter to be resolved quickly. How do mediation timelines compare to court cases?

Years may pass before a case ever comes before a judge. Mediation, by contrast, allows for parties to set their own pace and timeline. The duration of a mediation depends on the complexity of and circumstances regarding a dispute. A Separation Agreement may be fully negotiated, drafted, and signed after a handful of bi-weekly sessions.

How much does a divorce cost with a mediation?

According to Forbes the average financial cost of a divorce in the U.S. is between $15,000 and $20,000. The average cost of a mediated divorce is a fraction of that, averaging closer to $5,500.

A trauma informed approach acknowledges that past experiences affect how individuals interact and negotiate. Eric recognizes the impact of adversity and trauma on individuals, and adapts his engagements with individuals and organizations to foster an environment guided by the values of safety, trustworthiness, autonomy, collaboration, and empowerment. By integrating trauma-informed principles, Eric works to create a space where participants feel respected and understood, allowing them to engage collaboratively in the resolution process. Empowering individuals to express their needs and concerns ultimately leads to more sustainable and amicable solutions. Through trauma-informed mediation, we promote healing and understanding, facilitating a path toward resolution that honors each person's unique journey.

A trauma-informed approach is ideal for particularly sensitive issues related to significant life changes, including those related to divorce, aging, and disability.

For more information, please refer to the University at Buffalo's Institute on Trauma and Trauma-Informed Care.